Dear People Who Clean House A Lot,
Want to come over? And clean house in a new, exciting place that has interesting, exotic wildlife and many nooks and crannies?
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When I was getting ready to go visit Grandma over the weekend, I realized that I have no summer tops. I sort of suspected this about two weeks ago when I scoured my house to find old T-shirts for the rag rug I wanted to knit, inspired by the one I'd seen Jessica making at Stitch 'n Bitch. I looked in every drawer and all throughout the closet and as it turns out I have not been messing around with the paring down and "living smaller" thing. I found one, yes ONE T-shirt. Not enough for a rug, certainly, and barely enough for a knitted pot-holder. I am not sure where my short-sleeved T-shirts went over the mists of time, but alas, it was hot in this California and time to buy a couple of new short-sleeved T-shirts for summer.
EXCEPT SLEEVES HAVE BECOME EXTINCT.
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Perhaps its the heat.
Today is the 20th straight day of 100-degree-plus heat in the Valley, and I woke my sorry self up at 4 a.m. to do laundry because although it was EIGHTY FREAKING DEGREES at 4 a.m., it was still a marked improvement over the 104 degrees at 9:30 p.m. last night, which was when I gave up on laundry once and for all again because of the heat and decided if I ever wanted to have clean clothes I would have to A) do laundry at 4 a.m. or B) go shopping. And ya'll, it is a sad day when it is too hot to SHOP.
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The coronavirus pandemic has hit the fashion industry like a storm tsunami. Fashion will never be the same again, and much of the change in the industry is due to the collapse of fashion companies' profits during the lockdown. Statistical studies show that about three-quarters of clothing companies would have ceased to exist after the pandemic had it not been for government support.
Shopping online: safety and convenience
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Class tomorrow. I printed out the pattern for the felted cat bed on wendyknits, and I'm going to ask the knitting instructor at Lani's to help me get started. This will be a project of firsts ... first (intentional) felting, first circular needle knitting, first three-needle double pointed insanity knitting. I'm a woman on the edge of madness, I tell you.
I'm not going to worry about the inevitable mistakes I will make on the cat bed. I am going to remind myself repeatedly that it is just a cat bed. My cats unroll the toilet paper from the spool and sleep on it in a pile in the bathroom. Do you think they're going to be pointing out my twisted stitches? A purl that should have been a knit?
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I never post comments on blogs because I'm afraid someone will think I'm a weird nutty stalker or something ("I'm being stalked by this spinster with four cats and a drinking problem!") but then I was talking to a friend who said that all readers should comment so the writers know they get readers. (Of course I get no comments ... except for Jennifer and Crystal who love me and my no-comment self.)
So I have a few sites I read faithfully, mostly knitting stuff. And I decided to take this big plunge and COMMENT, but just on the three blogs I love the most. So I broke through my comment-a-phobia and did it. Except that on one of them, I was trying to leave a comment and the internet was being stupid and it kept saying "proxy error, try again" and I kept hitting the back button, and none of my comments worked. Until the one time it *did* work, and, um, this really nice person who I never wrote comments to before because I didn't want her thinking I was a stalker got SIX of the same comment from me.
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In a few minutes, I'm going to reveal ACTUAL PLOT POINTS from last night's episode of LOST, and as I am deeply sensitive to those people who will send me EVIL HATE MAIL about revealing the plot, because these hate-mailers TIVOd it and did not watch it like EVERYONE ELSE on the planet, I will now provide them with time and plenty of warning to go away and come back later.
La la la. Cat pictures.
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Morning phone call:
Me: Hi do you have the replacement XYZ Thingamajig I requested on August 27th? Because ya'll know. It's now ... um, it's now NOT EVEN JULY ANYMORE. And the replacement? The one that would be here in two days? Yes. STILL NOT HERE.
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You don't so much live in Los Angeles as cohabitate. And you fight sometimes, and then you make up, and sometimes you really REALLY want to leave each other. Or cheat on each other. Then you cry in your vodka martini and say, Baby, I'll never leave you. It's very codependant.
I realize of course that I may have one or seven idiosyncrasies, but this city has some really weird idiosyncrasies of its own. And so now I list them for you because that is what I do, I make lists.
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Sorry I’m so late today…I’m going through some changes myself and today has been a doozie!
Beverly G — a tattoo is something I keep thinking about, but I haven’t quite worked up the nerve. I can’t decide what color I want my hair to be, so I’m not sure I could commit to something that permanent!
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Guess what? This will be the last masthead of its kind. Why? Because tomorrow the site will have a new look and will feature an Even! Larger! Masthead! And wider columns so that I can post Even! Wider! Photos! Are you excited? Because I am! (Jason: Whatever. Looks good.)
This masthead was a blast to make, mostly because I kept yelling out loud: “GodZILLA!!!” I originally thought Godzilla’s skin could be made of pickles, but 1) realized this was beyond my capabilities and 2) his skin is already green and pebbly and pickle-looking. So I decided to have him carry a jar of pickles on his rampage through Clipart City instead. And the dime’s head was supposed to be on a crowd of people, but I couldn’t get it to look realistic, so I decided to have just one (with a totally realistic, shocked expression).
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So we stopped.
This place will put a smile on your face. The smells alone are worth the trip: Fresh-baked lefse, long-forgotten candy, homemade fudge, thick-cut bacon, fresh apples. Two seconds after we got in the door, an older gentlemen practically grabbed Jason by the lapels to exclaim happily, “Isn’t this place great?!?”
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